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The Four Types of People In The Condom Aisle

Buying condoms is never a comfortable situation. Whether it’s 2AM and you’re rushing out drunk to get a pack for the girl you know probably has enough yeast growing in forbidden places to start a bread company, or you’re just adding it to your shopping list. Typically, you’ll see a few types of people in the condom aisle. After sitting on a stool in the condom aisle at Walmart for two hours taking notes, this is what I’ve found. READ MORE

Adorable Childrens Toy For Sale

Some fool on Craiglist is giving away this adorable doll for free. People just don't value priceless items like this anymore. Yesterday I caught my girlfriend trying to throw away her tampon. She should know better, 30 minutes in the wash and its as good as new. READ MORE

Who I Want On My Side For The Zombie Apocalypse

This guy seems to know what he's doing. I think I'd just follow him around and offer occasional humor relief. READ MORE

New Way To Meet Chicks: Dream Clubs

Forget golfing, sailing or Match.com. According to The New York Times, 32-year-old Lily Michaud, of Portland, Oreg., met her husband in a "dream club." READ MORE

Sexy Girl Fails With A Shotgun

OUTGOING PLUG

Maybe she should have put more of the recoil pressure on her boobs. It could have saved her a great deal of pain and embarrassment. READ MORE

CMT Awards Remind Me Why I Hate Country Music

Anything that takes 'Red Solo Cup' seriously is something that I just can't take seriously. READ MORE

Shit Nobody Says

If you've ever heard someone say any of these things, punch them in the face. READ MORE

SSD Angels Black Ops

OUTGOING PLUG

I need to hire those black ops guys to sneak into my ex-girlfriends and get my cat back. READ MORE

Thanks News, For The Awesome Image

I'm really glad they chose to use that particular image, it really makes the whole thing a lot more vivid. READ MORE

Shows My Girlfriend Makes Me Watch: Sex and the City

They should have named this show Appletinis and Shoes. And the City. READ MORE

Becoming A Real Man Like Ron Swanson

I feel like the concept of manliness is slowly disintegrating. With the influx of skinny jeans, crappy pop music, and hipsters, we all need a strong dose of Ron Swanson. READ MORE

Participate in the AXE Clean Your Balls Campaign for Prizes!

Time for our readers to show how clever they are... READ MORE

20 Hairstyles That Could Be Considered Child Abuse

Lets face it, our parents were assholes who got pleasure out of dressing us up like morons. Take a look through this gallery and see if maybe you can spot a kid who had the same haircut. READ MORE

6 Signs That You Might Be in an M. Night Shyamalan Movie

With the Shyamalan-produced Devil on its way to theatres, Evilchili is here to ponder a question that is obviously on everyone's mind: are we all in an M. Night Shyamalan movie right now? READ MORE
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