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President Obama Sent Me a Drunk Text on New Year's Eve

If Obama understood the people, he'd understand that we're too drunk for a text message at this hour... READ MORE

The Unhelpful Teacher Meme

I think that everyone has had a teacher like this. The one you absolutely hate and daydream about stabbing with a #2 pencil. READ MORE

EvilChili's Patented* Hangover Cures!

Guaranteed to possibly work! READ MORE

This Panda Can Dance Better Than You

I've been known to bust a move or two (or a load or two while dirty dancing), but I think we can all agree that this panda know's how to move his private parts suggestively. READ MORE

EvilChili Investigates: Classroom Note Passing

We did a little bit of gonzo journalism over the last few weeks and injected a "student" in a local middle school. The variety of notes she intercepted is... troubling. After a four week course, preparing her "how 2 tlk like a 12 yr old", we felt she was ready to move in. READ MORE

F*CK EASTER, My Life Sucks

Guys, I'm fucking sick of this. I'm almost 20 and haven't been able to score a better job than a fucking cook at a local fast food joint. Make sure you read this till the end. READ MORE

Shows My Girlfriend Makes Me Watch: Fashion Police

It's exactly like COPS, except not at all. READ MORE

The Most Depressing Places on Earth, Pt. 1

We list all of the places that make us sad. READ MORE

Everyone Has That 'Friend'

When you think of a goat, you usually don't think of an assh*le bully, but "Buttermilk" has some problems with bullying. READ MORE

Some Things Your Teachers Never Told You

EvilChili has all the answers. READ MORE

Compilation of People Walking Into Stuff

Everyone has had that one time when they walked into a glass door. Luckily for most of us, it wasn't captured on camera. READ MORE

Tupac Wows the Crowd at Coachella...16 years After His Death

After teardown of the second Coachella set, fans are assessing what acts did and did not meet the standards set for 2012. READ MORE

Things You Notice About High School When You Return as an Adult

High school still sucks. Just, like, in a much funnier way. READ MORE

The Most Badass Kid Ever

I hope someday my kid will turn out like this. Drunk, crazy, and stealing presents. READ MORE
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