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President Obama Sent Me a Drunk Text on New Year's Eve

If Obama understood the people, he'd understand that we're too drunk for a text message at this hour... READ MORE

We Put A Rover On Mars But…

We managed to fly a rover over 35 million miles to reach mars. Then we managed to make it land and take pictures and scientific data and send it back to us on earth while we all watched in awe. READ MORE

The Lady Gaga Guide to Musical Revolution

Lady Gaga seems to be the biggest thing to happen to pop music in quite a while, gaining fans young and old. Many have praised her for being smart and edgy, claiming that she is unafraid to push the conventional boundaries of the music industry and challenge typical audience perceptions. With that in mind, let’s take a closer look at just how she has managed to craft such a revolutionary image for herself. (The answer is "stupidly.") READ MORE

If I Can't Beat Off, Then The Terrorists Win

A new law was passed recently which officially banned masturbating on international flights. It’s a strangely specific piece of legislation, and normally I’d be content to just laugh at the fact that the government actually spent time and tax dollars on this benign subject, but they’re going to be classifying this action as a felony, so as an avid masturbator, I have to defend my civil liberties. The law was deemed “necessary,” because it dealt with “aspects of national security.” Another innocent pleasure lost because of Al Qaeda. Thanks a lot Islamic fundamentalists. READ MORE

The Sexiest Themed Party Ever

OUTGOING PLUG

Looks like a real blast to me. They must have spent a lot to get all those condoms. I wonder if they're reselling them? READ MORE

Japanese Cuddle Cafes

Years ago, sad lonely men had to turn to dolls to cuddle up with at night. Now, thanks to the ingenuity of Japan, you can cuddle up with a real girl, for a price of course. READ MORE

The Guiltiest Dog In Existance

I don't think it'd take a judge and jury to decide that this dog is as guilty as can be. READ MORE

The Faces of Rock

You may not have noticed it, but every guitarist seems to have their own signature facial expression. This video highlights it in a hilarious manner. There was way too much emotion in the Kristen Stewart. READ MORE

The Story of My Addiction to Energy Shots

Completely true, except for the parts that are not. READ MORE

Big Tennessee Weddin'

Now this is the definition of classy. READ MORE

Back to School Special: Making a Good Impression at College

Summer's over, and it's time to head back to school. Here's a guide to making a good impression. READ MORE

Will Smith & Doug E Fresh Freestyle Rap

In case you weren't sure, Will Smith has still got those skills. Watch has he murders this freestyle. READ MORE

Keep It Classy, Reuters

Reuters reported on the event with the following caption to the above image: "Walter Dix of the U.S. crosses the finish line ahead of compatriot Tyson Gay to win the men's 200 meters at the Prefontaine Classic Diamond League track meet in Eugene, Oregon July 3, 2010." READ MORE
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