What have I done to deserve such torment? Nothing. I was born in captivity, and unless this is some sort of incomprehensible punishment for a barbaric sin I committed in a past life, there is no justification for this kind of torture. I have nearly rejected the possibility of the existence of a god, yet I can’t, simply because only a mind greater than that of any Earth creature could devise such an unbearable torment.
There is a higher power, and it is an unyielding sadist.
Although I have spent the entirety of my life confined within this small box, my natural instincts tell me that I am meant to be out in the open sea. Now, consider my size, and then consider the size of the ocean.
I am meant to inhabit an environment that is so vast, my small brain can barely fathom it. I am supposed to live in a place so large, so nearly infinite, that I could spend my entire life exploring only a relatively miniscule patch of it and still never be in the exact same location twice. I am meant to be free, to travel in schools, to be social, to seek out my own food, to live as any decent fish ought to.
And yet, I find that I have spent all of my days confined to a space so small that I could traverse its entire length in but a moment. I have no companion, save for the gigantic creatures who torment me with their malice, staring into my cell, delighting in my suffering. The bitter irony is that I depend upon these god-monsters for sustenance; without them, I would starve, and while I have spent nearly every day of my life hoping for the sweet embrace of death, I still have my pride. I won’t die in such a dishonorable fashion.
And so, I continue to exist, although my existence is one of perpetual misery. I am sure that they will never let me out of this prison while I am alive. I sometimes beg to whatever higher power cast me into these circumstances for mercy, for some end to my torment. I dream of freedom, but if freedom is too great a pleasure for me to enjoy, I would at least wish to perish in an honorable manner.
Do you know what it is to live your life confined to such a small space? Do you have any idea how it feels to be born in a prison and to never leave? What is worse, you can’t possibly imagine what it must feel like to endure this kind of devilish torture without any explanation. There is no reason for this, I tell you! I could not have done anything wrong! Isn’t there any true karmic balance in this world? I was born, as we all are born…as an innocent.
Despite this, I have been forced to experience the kind of pain that few can possibly imagine. I applaud anyone for having the courage to even visualize, for an instant, the possibility of experiencing my plight firsthand. It is beyond the realm of all understanding, and yet it is the only reality I know.
Pity me, fools.