If I wasn't 40 lbs overweight and broke, I'd consider going to a concert and giving this a try. I'd worry that people would use this as a chance to grab at my large package though. I often worry people are just waiting for an excuse to give the old garden hose a tug.
Commuting to work is the only American pastime that is more boring than baseball. That being said, let’s take a look at some of the ways in which you can more efficiently make my daily commute a pants-shitting nightmare, okay?