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How to Look Like a Smart Person on Facebook

Actually being smart involves too much effort. READ MORE

The Best Way To Apologize To A Hot Girl

Gentlemen, take notes. If you ever slip the C word on your girl, you'll want to follow this protocol. READ MORE

Meet the Vuvuzela

More than anything else, this year's World Cup has introduced the planet to the "vuvuzela" — the "stadium horn" responsible for every match sounding like it's under siege by a swarm of angry bees. READ MORE

Anyone Care For Drugs?

OUTGOING PLUG

Viral Internet Videos. My Anti-Drug. I really can't make fun of her too much though. I often confuse potholes for bathtubs too. Just last week I was caught naked in a pothole in Brooklyn. The bastards didn't even let me rinse the shampoo out. READ MORE

#BaldForBieber

4Chan spread a nice juicy rumor that Justin Bieber had cancer and that in support of him, women should shave their heads. Needless to say, girls were that stupid. READ MORE

11 Redneck Improvisations

Just because you don’t have exactly what you need for a job doesn’t mean you should quit. Square pegs, round holes, who gives a damn amirite? READ MORE

People Who Should be on Dancing with the Stars

Only the best D-list celebrities get this honor. READ MORE

What She Says, What Men Hear

Men and women have always had difficulty communicating what they actually mean to each other. Words only say so much; science has shown us that subtext, body language, and how much of an asshole a person is all play a key role in determining what the actual content of a message might be. This is especially problematic for the male sex, as we are naturally suspicious and don't take anything at face value. Here's a handy guide telling you what a woman is saying, and what the man thinks she is really saying. READ MORE

4Chan Sends Justin Bieber To North Korea

Kim Jong-Il and Justin Bieber are soon to be fast friends after 4Chan members voted for days to send the young singer there as part of the "My World Tour" Twitter voting contest which asked fans to vote on which country he should tour next, without restriction on which countries could be included in the vote. READ MORE

Shows My Girlfriend Makes Me Watch: What Not to Wear

Another installment of the most poorly informed column ever written by someone not employed by NewsCorp! READ MORE

EvilChili's Tips for Graduates

Selling out and being the heir to a fortune are all important steps on the path to success. READ MORE

Toast To Arthur's Day!

OUTGOING PLUG

I know we have some fans over in the UK so lets raise our glasses and toast to Arthur's Day! READ MORE

Kevin Durant Dunks Over The 7'2” Roy Hibbert

To be able to dunk over someone that is 7'2", you have to have some serious hops! READ MORE

A Few Short Messages Which Must Be Read

I feel like there are a few things which need to be addressed. Since the only people who use snail mail are either my ex-girlfriends with there "child support" or my Grandma with Alzheimer's sending Christmas cards once a month, they are delivered to you via the interweb. READ MORE
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