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Why You Should Never Pass Out On The Beach

OUTGOING PLUG Posted on 09/06/2010 by Brian Weiss

I passed out on the beach once. I woke up with 2 feet of sand covering my entire body and beer bottles all around me. For all I know, I could have been teabagged by a hot chick too. READ MORE

10 Great Things Hippies Have Given the World

Posted on 09/06/2010 by Joseph Oliveto

Labor Day special! Many mock followers of the hippie movement for claiming to be about peace while spending most of their time getting high, listening to bad jam bands, and condemning anyone who is vaguely conservative or dislikes Phish. Well, Evilchili is here to celebrate, in great detail, all the major accomplishments of this profound subculture. READ MORE

The Worst Music Video You Will Ever See

Posted on 09/05/2010 by Brian Weiss

There are somethings which you wish you never saw. Like the time my 95 year old neighbor walked around his front yard naked calling for his dog which died ten years ago. This is another one of those things. READ MORE

If You Like Dogs..

Posted on 09/03/2010 by Andrew Lamers

If you like dogs then you will like this. READ MORE

Three Jobs That Aren't As Cool as They Look on Screen

Posted on 09/02/2010 by Joseph Oliveto

Hollywood makes everything look cooler than it actually is. I just wish someone told me this when I was thinking about what I wanted to be growing up... READ MORE

Blonde Chick Has a Mishap

OUTGOING PLUG Posted on 09/02/2010 by Brian Weiss

Blonde girls should be required to wear helmets and floaties at all times. It would greatly improve their chances of survival. READ MORE

Pathetic First Day of School Pictures

Posted on 09/02/2010 by Brian Weiss

Billy Madison once said, "Off to school, off to school, to prove to daddy that I'm not a fool". Luckily for him, his dad didn't insist on taking an awkward photo of him for his departure. Luckily for us, these parent's decided to. READ MORE

The Real Reason Guys Watch Tennis

OUTGOING PLUG Posted on 09/01/2010 by Brian Weiss

It's not because they enjoy wearing sweaters tied around their neck, its really because they enjoy the extensive amount of bouncy cleavage being displayed before them. READ MORE

The Lady Gaga Guide to Musical Revolution

Posted on 09/01/2010 by Joseph Oliveto

Lady Gaga seems to be the biggest thing to happen to pop music in quite a while, gaining fans young and old. Many have praised her for being smart and edgy, claiming that she is unafraid to push the conventional boundaries of the music industry and challenge typical audience perceptions. With that in mind, let’s take a closer look at just how she has managed to craft such a revolutionary image for herself. (The answer is "stupidly.") READ MORE

Your Dog Will Never Be This Cool

Posted on 08/31/2010 by Brian Weiss

My dog passed #1 in his class during obedience training, but even after that strict education, he'd never be able to do this. Imagine if you owned this dog. You could get laid 2-3 times a month, just by taking him to raging kegger parties. READ MORE

Zoe Saldana Is The Hottest Calvin Klein Model Ever

OUTGOING PLUG Posted on 08/31/2010 by Brian Weiss

While scouting the hot actresses on the red carpet for tonight's Emmy's (we'll have all the photos in the morning), we spotted a commercial starring Zoe Saldana for Calvin Klein's "Nothing to Hide" underwear. We're pretty sure the videos and photos and have been out for a while now, but it's the first we've seen of them, so we thought we'd share. READ MORE

Back to School Special: Making a Good Impression at College

Posted on 08/30/2010 by Joseph Oliveto

Summer's over, and it's time to head back to school. Here's a guide to making a good impression. READ MORE

Cleavage Vs. Car Drifting

OUTGOING PLUG Posted on 08/30/2010 by Brian Weiss

This is a good way to test out the g-forces in your car. Just put a girl with massive milk jugs in the front seat and your pedal to the floor. READ MORE

Evilchili Teaches You How to Pull a Kanye!

Posted on 08/26/2010 by Joseph Oliveto

Yes, you CAN be the center of attention! READ MORE
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