The Greatest Fast Food Freakouts of All Time

OUTGOING PLUG

More often than not, fast food restaurants serve as boxing rings for customer confrontations, meltdowns, and heated outbursts. These shrines and sanctuaries dedicated to scarfing down pattie after pattie of processed meat and superized Diet Coke have the Hulk-like ability to provoke deranged, confrontational hysteria in certain members of the human species. READ MORE

Dating Tip #14: Be Honest Up Front

Women value honesty in a relationship. I remember one time I had a girl convinced I was Batman so she wouldn't think it was weird that I sleep in an abandoned mineshaft on an old mattress. She broke it off because of my lying (at least that's what my Mom said). Anyway, take it after this guy if you ever want to get touched where you pee. READ MORE

Megan Fox Appears In Eminems New Music Video

OUTGOING PLUG

I would totally have a messy relationship with Megan Fox. Even if it meant that she'd have to yell at me a lot and tell me that I'm not good enough for her. I mean, she already has "Brian" tattooed right by her cooter. I'm pretty much destined to be with her. READ MORE

A Word about Masculinity... Written By A Hot Girl

In this day and age, men in their 20’s are finding it increasingly acceptable to reject their God-given qualities. A high percentage of heterosexual men, typically within the age range of 20-27, have chosen to forfeit their masculinity in exchange for a new set of behaviors. READ MORE

Honest Ways to Sign a Yearbook, Part 2

It's that time of year again. READ MORE

Insightful Comments I Have Overheard While Playing Call of Duty

The online gaming community is a sensitive and nuanced group. READ MORE

Why Dogs Bite People

Everyone's always shocked when a dog lashes out and bites someone, but after you view this album of pictures... I think you'll understand. READ MORE

Best Breaking Bad Parodies

The most anticipated show of the summer has spawned some hilarious parodies. Get ready for the season to start this Sunday! READ MORE

Back to School Special: Making a Good Impression at College

Summer's over, and it's time to head back to school. Here's a guide to making a good impression. READ MORE

The Five Types of People Talking About ObamaCare

Because EvilChili is nothing if not a reputable news source. READ MORE

Street Performer Pranks Girl

Street performers have to be one of the most underrated, and at the same time talented group of people out there today. Watch as this prank goes down! READ MORE

#YOLO Has Gone Too Far

It seems that every town idiot is now using the trendy hashtag #YOLO to explain their dangerous and stupid decisions. YOLO, meaning You Only Live Once, comes from the root word herpes. READ MORE

The Vampire Guide to Seduction

Vampires are hot these days, so they must be doing something right that other men are oblivious to. By studying their ways, perhaps you, too, can be a killer ladies' man. READ MORE